Saturday, June 5, 2010

Fucking Sobriety.......


Three years ago, I was an unlovable, angry, unhealthy, drunk guy, who was sick of the world, the bullshit, the rat race and the game. That was 1,048 days ago... Now I am a 50% lovable 50% angry, Very healthy, sober guy, who is learning to tolerate the bullshit rat race world we live in. three years ago I had a job I should have quit, now I have a job I fuckin' love and want to stay at for 28 years. I have made many sacrifices and have prayed and meditated to get where I am today. I can say with the utmost certainty that I never want to go back to the way I was. I look at my sobriety like a tattoo. I thought about it for a long time. I decided it was something I want in my life till' I die. When I first "got it" it hurt like hell. It took some time to heal and really set in and know its there for life....and I love it. It was time. who knows where I would have ended up, dead, in prison, in the gutter. Fuck it.I can't lie there are times when I miss the sweet warmth of my beloved Makers Mark, but one sip and its all down the fuckin' toilet. I just wanted to post something. I have been so neglegent in my blogging. but who the fuck cares anyway. I have beenkeeping busy studying about 50 LBs. of railroading books. Signals, switches, shoves, brakes....fuck...Its been a great year and it keeps getting better. I'd like to thank my higher power Demi Moore for keeping me on the right track.... Thats all ....peace out.

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